“In chaos, there is fertility.” ~Anais Nin
How did I get to this point?This question pulsed through my brain repeatedly as I drove to my parents’ house in a state of complete exhaustion. My young daughter was strapped in the back seat, my pregnant belly pushing against the steering wheel, hot tears streaming down my face.I was done. I had nothing left to give. How did I get here?Gradually, then suddenly.
With eternal gratitude to Hemingway, three simple words so elegantly summarize how I ended up in a situation I didn’t want or expect.
“How did you go bankrupt?”
“Gradually, then suddenly.”
~Ernest Hemingway (The Sun Also Rises)
It happened so gradually, almost imperceptibly. And then suddenly, unequivocally, shockingly, I had suffered an emotional breakdown.Looking back, I can see that I had willingly immersed myself in anxiety, perfectionism, comparisons, sleep-deprivation, a lack of mindfulness, poor health, and the idea that I deserved…
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Sixty and Single Again 